After much work, I came up with 6 full shelves of stuff to eBay. Oh my! Trying to fit that into my schedule has not been fun. But eBay is running a sale right now that ends December 12th - so I set a goal to finish by then.
Almost all of the stuff I listed on eBay were books. But there was one special item that Jim brought home that needed to disappear from the homestead. It was this:
Here is the eBay description I listed for it:
Spiderman Ninja Knife
My husband is the greatest guy in the world. He’s forever bringing home lots of things for me. Some things I specifically ask for. Some things he just knows I need. But, when he brought home this spiderman ninja knife, I just had to laugh at him.
“What am I supposed to do with a spiderman ninja knife?” I asked him. His immediate reply was, “Open the mail?” Ok, I had to laugh at him again.
Let’s take a closer look at this thing. It is a heavy (ceramic? plaster?) hand, dressed in a spiderman glove. The wrist is coming out of what looks to be rocks, with 3 big spiders on it. In the hand is what my husband describes as a ninja knife. The knife has a cover on it. The knife and cover can be removed from Spidey’s hand.
But now what? What am I supposed to do with a 7” sharp stainless steel blade?
I could slice some meat for dinner with it. But to be honest, spiderman doesn’t exactly go with my kitchen décor. And the knife doesn’t exactly fit in my knife block – after all, it was made to fit in Spiderman’s hand!
And let’s just say, for the sake of argument, that I decided to keep the spiderman ninja knife as a conversation piece. I can just picture the conversations it would start. In case you didn’t know, I have 8 children, and five of them are boys. I can picture tons of conversations like this:
Mrs. Jones, the neighbor: “Well, PJ. I certainly enjoyed the view out of my back window today.”
Me: “Uh, oh! Now what did you see.”
Mrs. Jones: “Oh nothing much. But Emery sure can run fast.”
Me: “Dare I ask why was he running?”
Mrs. Jones: “Well, it appeared that Fletcher was chasing him brandishing a spiderman ninja knife and threatening to slash his throat.”
Me: “Oh, yes, I think they were playing pirates this morning.”
Or another conversation:
Knock. Knock.
Me: “Hello, Mr. Electric meter man. Can I help you?”
Mr. Electric Meter Man: “Your children have threatened to cut my arms off if I don’t report that you used only 2 kilowatts last month. You do know that is fraud, right?”
Me: “Ummm, yes, sorry about that. We’ve been trying to figure out different ways to save electricity. I guess they were tired of turning off the lights. But you do know they wouldn’t hurt you.”
Mr. Electric Meter Man: “I don’t know, that Spiderman Ninja Knife looked pretty convincing.”
Me: “Well, thank you for not suing us for threatening you with bodily injury.”
So you see, I simply cannot keep this thing. It is going to lead to mayhem and loss of blood if it is allowed to stay. I appreciate the thoughtfulness of my husband in bringing me this lovely gift. But I really think it is better off in another home. Preferably one without lots of blood thirsty boys :)
So, do you think I'll be able to get rid of it?
PJ
Updated: Spidey didn't sell. Anybody want a Spiderman ninja knife??



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